


That's Why I Love You

by WolfangK19



Series: That's Why I Love You [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Fluff, Gay Disaster Lexa (The 100), Titus Being an Asshole (The 100)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:26:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28159023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfangK19/pseuds/WolfangK19
Summary: What if in that scene in 3X07 Lexa said "That's why I love you" to Clarke? Pud Lexa does get shot, but Clarke saves her. Lot's of Clexa and Octaven cause I don't care what people say, I ship them.
Relationships: Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Octavia Blake/Raven Reyes
Series: That's Why I Love You [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2091987
Comments: 12
Kudos: 58





	1. That's Why I Love You

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic so don't be to harsh lol.  
> I own nothing except the mistakes, I'll update as often as possible.

Clarke knocked on the door gently, awaiting the usual call of 'enter'. When it didn't come she quietly pushed the door open, peering into the commanders room. She wasn't there. Clarke shut the door behind her and walked in, looking around the room she'd scarcely been in.

"Clarke?" Called a familiar voice. She turned around to see Lexa stood there.

"I'm sorry" Clarke said simply.

"When do you leave" Lexa asked, sadness laced in her voice.

Clarke hesitated. "Now" Clarke just looked at her feet, and mumbled another quiet sorry. Lexa saw.

"No, you have to go back to your people. That's why I l-" 'shit'

Clarke's head snapped up, a slight look of shock was visible on her face.

"That's why you're you" Lexa corrected, it being her turn to look down at her feet.

"Lex, what were you going to say?" Clarke asked softly.

'Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck'

Lexa kept her head down and quietly whispered "that's why I love you"

Clarke blushed, although Lexa couldn't see. Lexa blushed too, although she didn't dare look up at Clarke.

They stood there for a few more seconds before Lexa looked up. She looked at Clarke and immediately regretted it. She couldn't help falling in love with this sky girl, she was sensational. She closed her eyes and said "Clarke, I-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said tha-"

She was silenced by a pair of soft lips pressing against her own. Fireworks went off in her head. She was slightly unsure as to what was happening until Clarke gently pulled away. "I love you, Leksa kom Trikru" she whispered against Lexa's lips. Lexa smiled and pressed her lips back against Clarke's. There was a knock on the door, but Lexa payed it no attention, whoever it was would go away eventually.

They were interupted by another knock. Lexa sighed as she pulled away from Clarke.

"One moment ai skai princess"

Clarke nodded. However, Lexa picked up her hand and squeezed it gently.

"Enter" she called in her strong, stoic voice. The door opened and Titus stood before them.

"Titus, I am in the middle of something important, will this take long?"

"No, apologies Heda, I didn't mean to interupt, there have been Azgeda sightings near Polis, troops. Klark and Oktevia would do better to travel back to the skai people tomorrow."

"Thank you Titus, is that all?"

"Sha, Heda" Titus threw Clarke a dirty look before turning around and leaving, shutting the door behind him.

"What is his problem with me?" Clarke asked having clearly noticed the look he gave her.

"He believes the comander should live without love, that love is weakness" Lexa finished with a sigh.

"Well, I say love is strength" Clarke says smiling softly at Lexa. Lexa returns the smile, wrapping her hands around Clarke's waist, pulling her in to give her another soft kiss. 'Screw Titus' Lexa thought 'If this is love, may it remain strong for ever more.

Clarke traced her finger around the tatoo on Lexa's back, relaxing together for the small amount if time they had before she had to leave. They didn't talk, very happy to sit in a comfortable silence.

Clarke peered out the window, noticing that the sun was begining to set. As Titus had said, she would do better to leave tomorrow.

"Lex, night has nearly fallen, do you want me to leave?" Clarke asked softly, hating to break the silence.

"Hmm, leave where?" Lexa said sleepily.

"Back to my room?" Clarke hated saying it.

"No, please, stay" Lexa said almost begging.

"Always" Clarke finished, pressing a gentle kiss to the crook of Lexa's neck. She wrapped her arms around the comanders waist, holding her as she drifted to sleep. Lexa caressed Clarke's arm as she heard her breath even out, and she also fell asleep.

Clarke woke up suddenly to the sound of screams. She bolted upright, searching for an attacker, but alas, there was none. The screaming was coming from Lexa.

She was thrashing and screaming; she was clearly having a nightmare.

"Lex, Lexa, please, wake up baby, it's just a night mare." Clarke said as she gently shook Lexa's shoulders.

"Clarke, Clarke, please, let Clarke go, please Clarke, come back. CCLLAARRKKEE!" Lexa shouted.

Clarke didn't know what the young comander was dreaming about, but she hated seeing Lexa so scared, even as she slept. She tried everything to wake her up but nothing worked. She got up and walked over to the small bathroom, filling up a cup with water from the drinking basin, and walked back over to the bed.

By now Lexa was whimpering, so Clarke decided to try and wake her up again.

"Lex, baby, please wake up." Clarke cooed.

Lexa finally woke up, shooting upright, her breathing eratic.

"C-clarke?" Her voice wavered, it was horse and frightened.

Clarke sat back down on the bed and wrapped her arms around Lexa.

"It's ok Lex, it was just a nightmare."

"But it wasn't, Azgeda had you, the Ice Queen had you, they were going to kill you in return for your people and there was nothing I could do. I-i-" Lexa stuttered as she spoke

"Baby, it's ok, I'm right here, I'm with you, we're ok."

Lexa nodded timidly, clearly still shaken up from the nightmare. She knew Clarke was okay, but since the peace with Azgeda had been broken she was worried they'd do what they did to Costia to Clarke. They both settled back down so they could sleep for a little while longer. 

*

The next morning Clarke went around her room gathering up her belongings, putting them in a small bag she could wear while travelling. She really didn't want to leave and would much rather stay in Pollis with Lexa, but she had to go back to her people. As she bent down to pick something up she heard the clock of a gun. 

"Hello Clarke" came Titus's cold voice. She stood up and turned around slowly, to see Titus stood there pointing a pistol at her.

"What do you want Titus?" She asked, being as calm as possible. ' well fuck' she though.

"You are a distraction to Heda, so therefore the only option is to get rid of you" he said, bringing up a second hand to steady the gun.

"You know Lexa will kill you if you do this" Clarke said, slowly shuffling towards the couch in the middle of the room.

"That's a price I'm willing to pay for my people" he said, although he did look a bit nervous at the thought of the wrath of the commander.

Clarke dove behind the couch as Titus fired the weapon. 

"Don't run Clarke, this is for Lexa" Titus growled.

She grabbed one of the wooden chairs sat by the table and threw it at Titus, promptly disorienting him. She jumped to her feet, sprinting for cover as she heard Titus cock the gun again.

"Clarke, what's going on-" Titus fired the gun, missing Clarke but hitting Lexa, who was running into the room, clearly confused by the gunshots.

Lexa looks down at her stomach where the bullet had found home, noticing the increasing blood stain.

"LEX!" Clarke screamed. She grabbed the gun of of Titus who was clearly stunned at what he's done, shooting him in the leg, effectively immobilising him. She then ran back to Lexa, catching her before she hit the ground. She carried her over to her bed and was gently laying her down. At that moment Octavia ran into the room, having heard the gunshots and not seeing Clarke where they had agreed to meet before leaving.

"Clarke!" She said coming to Clarke's side. 

"Get him the fuck out" she said pointing at Titus, not diverting her eyes from the bullet she was trying to get out of Lexa. Octavia obeyed, grabbing Titus and dragging him roughly out the room.

"Hold on baby, I need to remove the bullet" Clarke said, fighting back tears. Lexa nodded weakly. Clarke took a deep breath in before plunging two fingers into the wound. Lexa screamed. Clarke felt terrible, but she knew she had to remove the bullet of they were to have any hope of saving Lexa. She found the bullet and pulled it out as Lexa let out a shaky breath.

"Keep your eyes open for a little longer baby" Lexa nodded, but she was clearly exhausted. Clarke searched for a needle and thread to stitch up the wound. When she came back over to Lexa, Octavia had returned, and was stopping the blood with a blanket. 

"I need to stitch it up" Clarke said, trying to thread the needle, but her hands were shaking to badly.

"You need steady hands for that Clarke, allow me" Octavia said, taking the needle and thread from Clarke.

Clarke took one of Lexa's hands in her own and was whispering soothing words in her ear as Octavia finished the stitches.

"Done Clarke" Octavia said, putting the needle down.

"Okay" Clarke exhaled slowly. They decided to transfer Lexa to her room so the could clean Clarkes.

Clarke cleaned the wound and any dried blood while Octavia dealt with Clarkes room. When she went back into Lexa's room, she noticed Clarke checking Lexa's pulse.

"Is she okay?" Octavia asked softly, so to not startle Clarke.

"I think so, thank you" she said looking at Octavia.

"It was no problem, Lexa needed help and honestly, so did you"

"What happened to Titus?" Clarke asked, focusing her attention back on Lexa.

"The guards locked him up and are waiting on Hedas orders for the execution"

"Good. We should probably send a messenger back to Arkadia to tell them we won't be back for a bit" Clarke said, sighing, rubbing her aching temple.

"On it" Octavia said, getting up and leaving.

Clarke sighed again, tired from all the stress they'd been though in the last thirty minutes. 

"I'm not losing you, not yet, not ever" Clarke whispered, kissing Lexa's head softly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I'll try to update next week! Comments are writer fuel!


	2. Lost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you liked the first chapter here's the second! I hope you enjoy. I own nothing but the mistakes and any charectars I (maybe) add. Thanks!

A messenger was sent to Arkadia, letting them know Clarke and Octavia would be staying in Pollis for a while longer while they sorted things out. They didn't want to tell them about Lexa's injuries, at least, not yet. She'd been getting worse, the surrounding wound going I strange color. They'd been using ointments, herbs and doing everything they could. Lexa hadn't shown any signs that anything fatal was happening, but Clarke didn't want to risk it. About a week after Lexa had been shot she still hadn't woken up. They fed her what they could and made sure she was getting enough water, but nothing was happening, she was still asleep. Clarke made the decision to go back to Arkadia and bring her mother back to Pollis, this would take aproximately three days. She would take a guard with her for protection and Octavia would stay to make sure the commanders condition wouldn't get worse.  
"Look after her and keep yourself safe" Clarke said to Octavia.  
"I will, be careful, I'll see you in three days" Octavia replied, gripping Clarke's forearm.  
Clarke pressed a gentle kiss to Lexa's forehead,"wake up for me baby" she whispered. Octavia saw the gentle interaction and smiled, it reminded her of herself and Raven when Raven had been shot and was injured. How Octavia had cared for her even though others had offered to help. She missed her girlfriend very much, but she knew she had to stay and protect Lexa, for the coalition, but more importantly for Clarke.

Clarke climbed onto the back of her horse and greeted the grounder who would be her guard on the way back to Arkadia. She waved to Octavia and they set off, going at a steady pace. It was midday, they aimed to make it to the sky people's camp by this time the next day, taking a break to sleep through the night. The grounder didn't speak much, which Clarke didn't mind, it gave her plenty of time to think. Although all she could think about was Lexa. She loved her, a part of her thinks she had for a while, but was to scared to admit it to herself. She was also scared, scared because she didn't want to loose her; couldn't loose her. She had lost too many people, her father, Finn, many of the 100, but she'd also done a lot of bad things or blamed herself for a lot of bad things.  
"Klark? *Clarke*" It was the grounder.  
"Sha? *yes*" Clarke looked up.  
"Osir will nou hir gon the sheidgeda. *We will stop here for the night*" he said. Clarke hadn't been aware of the passing time, but was thankful for her limited knowledge of Trigedasleng.  
"Ok. Do yu speak gonasleng? *Ok. Do you speak English?*" Clarke asked.  
"Yes" the grounder replied.  
"Good, when we make it back to Arkadia, you will have to speak it as most of my people do not speak Trigedasleng"  
They were silent again, dismounting and setting up a small camp for the night. The grounder made a small fire on which he was currently cooking food. When it was done, he handed some of it to Clarke.  
"Mochof *thank you*" she said. They ate once again in silence. Clarke collected more wood so they could keep the fire going all night, for it would get colder as the time passed. He nodded when she put down the pile next to the fire. They lay down to sleep and nothing more happened.  
By Clarke's estimations, she woke about 3 hours later, sitting up to add more wood to the fire. She rubbed her eyes and looked around. The grounder was facing the other way, sleeping. She got up and put some more wood in the fire and went back to where she was sleeping before, and was settling down before she noticed something; the grounder wasn't breathing. She went over him and it was then she noticed the pool of blood around him. Someone had slit his throat while he slept and there was an arrow sticking out of his chest. The mark of Azgeda was printed on a small note attached to the arrow. She then relised they had stollen their horses. She drew her knife, being as quiet as possible to try and hear signs of life. She heard the snap of a twig and spun around, and then there was a sharp pain on the back of her skull and everything went black.

*

Clarke woke in a clearing unfamiliar to anywhere she'd been before. There was a dull ache where someone had hit her and knocked her out. She didn't recognise anything. She started to push herself up but everything started to spin as black spots danced in her vision, she grew dizzy and fainted again. By her predictions roughly an hour passed before she woke up again. This time, she pushed herself up slightly slower, getting to the point where she could crawl without fainting. She felt even more disorientated now, so she decided to try and find water first before she did anything else. She was all alone, had a head injury, no food, no water and no idea which way to go. She knew there was no use denying it, as it would only make her more miserable, but she was utterly and truly lost. She heard a rustle in the bush and turned around, griping the dagger she had. But it was only a pheasant. She killed it, knowing she'd have to eat eventually. She decided to try and stand again, this time being successful in her attempts. She ended up looking for a cave, as it'd offer shelter and warmth, if she could make a fire that is.

*

Octavia's pov:  
Octavia had continued to care for Lexa while she had been unconscious, but she was worried about Clarke. It had been four nearly five days since she had set off with the grounder to get her mother, and maybe they had just been held up, but there was a voice in the back of her head telling her that something was wrong. She decided if they didn't return by the seventh day, Clarke would send a messenger to Arkadia to see what had happened.

When Clarke still hadn't returned Octavia sent the messenger to ask about Clarke, she to told him to ask where she is, find out what the hold up was and when she was returning. Once the messenger had set off she returned back to Lexa's room, only to find her stirring.  
"Heda?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thaks for reading. Comments are writer fuel! If forgot to mention it but in this, Lexa never abandoned Clarke at Mount Weather and Lexa and Azgeda are enemys. I'll try and post next week! :)


	3. Where Are You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I'm a little late to posting this chapter, but it is also like 1000 words longer than the previous two so that balances it out, right? Hope you enjoy, there's a bit of time jumping and different perspectives in this chapter, so that's just a heads up. Enjoy!

Octavia’s pov:  
Lexa appeared to be waking up, from what Octavia could tell. 

“Clarke...” Lexa mumbled, seeming to still be half asleep. 

Octavia rushed over to her side, checking the waking commander's wound. Nothing seemed to be wrong, if anything, it looked better than it had been in a while. Octavia sighed in relief.  
The stitches in the puncture looked less bruised and discolored and there weren’t any signs that Lexa was bleeding.

Octavia rushed into the bathroom, scooping some water into a tin cup from the drinking basin to give to Lexa when she finally woke up. She knew Clarke would have preferred to be the first person Lexa saw when she first woke up, but Clarke still hadn’t returned from Arkadia. 

Suddenly Lexa shot up, wincing slightly as pain shot through her from her injury.

“Heda” Octavia sighed in relief, glad Lexa was awake after a week of being unresponsive. 

“Octavia,” Lexa said feebly, “Where is Clarke?” Lexa didn’t want to be rude, but she had no idea what happened and she just wanted to see her girlfriend (where they girlfriends? Lexa would have to ask Clarke about their label).

“She left to go to Arkadia about a week ago but still hasn’t returned, I sent a messenger to ask for her.” Octavia handed Lexa the cup of water. “Here, drink” She said, knowing Lexa would still be weakened from her injuries.

“That trip should only be about three days.” Lexa said worriedly. 

“I know Heda. When the messenger returns, we will decide what to do” Octavia said, hoping there had just been something Clarke had to help with that was causing her to not return yet.

Lexa took a sip of the water. Her hand was shaking. She couldn’t tell if it was from her weakened state or from her nerves for Clarke.

Lexa had to remain in bed for the time being, because Octavia wasn’t sure of what to do if Lexa suddenly went downhill, Clarke was the healer of the two of them.

After three days the messenger returned, Octavia had him come up to Lexa’s room so she could hear what he had to say to both of them.

“Heda, Okteivia, I have talked to the sky people, and they have not seen her. Klark and her guard also haven’t been seen by their patrols and no one knows of her whereabouts”

Panic started to spread through Lexa; Clarke was missing. Octavia noticed The Commanders withdrawal in focus and decided to dismiss the messenger.

“Mochof *thank you* for your information. Send for Indra then you may rest” Octavia finished.

“Sha, mochof *yes, thank you*.” the messenger bowed his head to both Lexa and Octavia before turning and leaving.

Octavia rushed over to Lexa’s side, shaking her shoulders gently. She could see the fear and panic in the Commanders eyes. Octavia started to plan out what they would need to do. She knew there was no chance that Clarke and her guard had gotten lost, they knew the way back to Arkadia like the back of their own hand. Something or someone must have attacked or ambushed them, or they were injured.

But no matter what had happened, Octavia decided they would send out a search party, herself among them, and they would look for Clarke and her guard. It would also probably be a good idea to go about half way to Arkadia, leaving the other half in the line of patrols, so if the Sky People found them it would be okay. If they hadn’t found them by then they would split into pairs or threes and search individually and search for approximately three days before regrouping whether or not they had found them by then.

“Don’t worry Heda, we’re going to find her” Octavia tells Lexa. She nods feebly, this time knowing it’s because of her weakened form.

There was a knock at the door that Octavia knew belonged to Indra. 

“Enter” Lexa called dimly. 

Indra pushed the door open stepping in quietly, shutting the door behind her. She noticed Octavia was next to Lexa, who looked injured. She knew something had happened because Lexa hadn’t been to any meetings for a little over a week, but nobody seemed to know what had happened.

“Heda, are you alright?” Indra said, rushing over to Lexa’s side.

“Yes, I was shot but Clarke saved me, although Clarke is the reason you’ve been called here” Lexa, with a lot of Octavia’s help, filled Indra in on how Titus shot her, how Clarke saved her, but how she wouldn’t wake up and then how Clarke set off nearly a week ago and hasn’t returned and no one knows where she is.

Lexa was looking weary so Octavia decided to tell Indra of the plan for the search party. Lexa nodded to Indra, telling her to listen to what Octavia had to say.

“If we want to get Clarke back, we are going to have to send out a search party of about 10 people-”

“11” Lexa interrupted.

“Heda, no, you are not well enough” Octavia protested.

“If I am fit enough to accompany you in three days, when you meet up and regroup, then I will go with you and Indra to search” Lexa said, not taking no for an answer.

“Fine, only one change, I will stay with you while Indra leads the search party and I will travel with you to meet them after the three days, only if you’re well enough though, and then the three of us will go to search for Clarke separately from the others” Octavia knew it would be a battle to get Lexa to agree to this, but she knew if Lexa got hurt anymore than she already was, Clarke would kill her when they found her.

Lexa was about to argue when Indra cut in, “I agree with Octavia,” Lexa glared at her, “If you are well enough, you can come and search with us, but if you’re not you must stay here and rest. Clarke wouldn’t want you hurting herself for her”

Lexa knew they were both right and this was the only agreement they’d settle on, so she just grumbled out an okay.

Indra bowed to Lexa and nodded her head to Octavia before leaving to gather eight guards to help search for Clarke. She knew the Commander and the Sky Girl had a special bond, and she’d also never seen Lexa this protective over someone before, except maybe for Costia. 

When she’d gathered the people and the weapons and supplies they'd need, they mounted horses and set off out of Polis, searching for Clarke.

Octavia watched them go from Lexa’s balcony before turning around and going back over to Lexa’s bed.

“Heda, may I check your wound?” Octavia was relieved that Lexa was awake, but she still didn’t want the bullet wound to get infected or anything like that.

“Sha” Lexa was extremely worried for Clarke, she didn’t know what she’d do if she lost her. First Costia, then her, she didn’t know if she could handle it.

*

Clarke pov:  
She knew it had only been about a week, but she was already starting to lose her mind it seemed. She had managed to find a small cave to offer her protection from the weather, the mid winter weather was very cold and she wasn’t sure she would survive. She was beginning to see people she felt she’d wronged. They’d sit and scream at her, and she’d do anything to get them to go away.

The worst of them was Finn though, as he would sit there, yelling at her, telling her how it was her fault he was dead, how the knife was meant for Lexa. 

She tried to ignore him, but it was so difficult when in truth she did blame herself for a multitude of people's deaths.

Another bad one was her father. He wouldn’t necessarily yell at her, but instead would give her disappointed looks, or tell her how she should have done more to stop him from being floated.

Until one day it all stopped. They stopped screaming at her and instead sat in silence, just staring at her. If anything, that was worse. At least when they were making noise there was something to fill the silence, but now it was eerie how quiet it was.

However, she couldn’t help feeling responsible for their deaths, even if it was out of her control. She just wanted to be back in Polis, with Lexa, as far away from this place as possible, even though she wasn’t sure where she was. She tried to keep track of the days, but it seemed like they were all just blending together, making it feel as if they were one. 

By what she believes was day ten, the hunger began to kick in. Sure, she’d managed to get drinking water, but she hadn’t eaten in what she estimated to be a week. She would have eaten before, but she hadn’t seen any animals and the only berries she’d come across looked to be poisonous, and she’d rather not die from berries.

It was early morning, so she decided to leave her cave in hope of coming across something to eat. She had fire and the skills to make one if needed, she had a knife so she was set. She left, the coldness from the night beginning to seep away as the sun bloomed on the horizon. 

She traveled in one direction so not to get lost and had been walking for about thirty minutes when she heard a rustling in the trees above. She stopped, peering up to try and spot what had made the noise. She was about to move on after not seeing anything when suddenly a pair of bright amber eyes stared straight at her. The eyes didn’t belong to any small creature, so she assumed it was a human, until it growled and leapt out of the tree, straight at her.

It was a panther. She ducked to the side, narrowly missing it’s claws. It’s black fur glinted in the sunlight and Clarke was unsure how she hadn’t seen it before. It snarled at her again, before jumping at her, swiping at her and snapping it’s jaws. 

She dogged again, but slashed at it with her knife. It yowled in pain, turning back to face her. It growled, running straight at her, knocking her over with great strength. It’s claws cut three deep gashes into her side and she let out a hiss of pain. 

Clarke gripped the knife firmly and plunged it into the big cat's chest. It let out one last yelp of pain and then fell sideways. It was dead.

She was aware the gashes on her side were bleeding rather heavily but Clarke was sure if she could make it back to her cave, she could cauterize them properly.

She picked up the front paws of the heavy creature and began dragging it. She made it about half way before stumbling to the ground, dizzy and exhausted, most likely due to the blood loss. She attempted to get to her feet, determined to make it back to her cave.

She eventually did make it back to her cave, although it took longer than anticipated. She dropped the paws of the panther and fell to the ground groaning, promptly passing out.

*

Lexa pov:  
Lexa had managed to recover enough for Octavia to let her go with her and Indra to search for Clarke. 

When they made it to where the other eight and Indra were, nobody was on their horse. Instead they were all surrounding something, which ended up being the body of the guard accompanying Clarke. When Octavia informed Lexa this, panic flared up in her chest, where was Clarke?

However, she put on a brave face, and they went on with the plan as normal. Octavia, Indra and herself were to head towards Azgeda territory to search, except they wouldn’t enter, for Azgeda would probably kill them on the spot, Heda or not.

They arrived where they planned on searching within a day, traveling at a fast pace. Lexa knew they’d have to turn back to meet the other searchers in four days, to come up with a new plan, so Lexa hoped someone found Clarke before then.

Lexa knew Clarke was smart and would probably be in a cave somewhere, as it offered shelter and protection against the elements. She doubted there was anywhere else Clarke would go.

They searched for two days, not finding a trace of Clarke. Lexa knew they’d have to start travelling back to the meeting point tomorrow and Lexa was disappointed, she only hoped that someone else found Clarke if it wasn’t them.

On the morning of their last day to search Lexa decided that if by midday they hadn’t found her, Indra would travel alone, as she was a competent warrior and would do fine on her own. Octavia and herself would start heading back the next morning.

Midday came and went, and Indra left back to the meeting point, just as it started to rain heavily. Another hour passed and still no luck, until Octavia noticed a dim light shining in the distance, approximately two miles away.

Octavia pointed it out to Lexa, and they immediately started traveling towards it at a brisk pace. The rain made it difficult to see, so they couldn’t go as fast as they may like to, but they were on the edge of Azgeda territory, so it may not even be Clarke.

As they neared the light Lexa realised it was coming from a cave. ‘Clarke!’ Lexa thought.

They made it to the cave entrance and dismounted, tying their horses under some trees, leaving them to graze. Lexa peered round the corner of the cave and then sprinted inside, Octavia followed her in. 

“Clarke!” Lexa shouted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Lexa found her, obviously (XD) and now comes the healing process mentally, as for being in the wild for like 2 weeks, Clarke's gone through some shit. Comments are writer fuel! It's my birthday in 2 days, so I'm gonna try and post something for this story, or an idea I had for another one, although, the other one isn't going to be based on The 100, so we'll see. Anyway, thanks for reading, I'll upload the next chapter hopefully next week, though I do go back to school, so I'll see what happens. Bye! :)


	4. Am I Real

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyooo! I AM SO SORRY! I am very aware it's been a month since the last chapter but life got a bit crazy when I went back to school, I go to a grammar school, so basically they like to throw like 2 week test weeks and yeah that happened. Anyway, it's here now. Also, I usually post on Friday and today is Monday but I wanted to post it now it's done, sorry it's a bit shorter than normal. If you like Octaven, go check out my other story Stay With Me, it's set before this story but it's part of the same universe. Ok, enough waffling, happy reading!

Lexa pov:

“Clarke!” Lexa shouted.

She rushed over to her side, carefully cradling the girls face. Lexa noticed she was ghostly pale and checked her for injuries.

It was then that she noticed three deep gashes running down her hips and ribs. She glanced at the dead panther lying a few feet away, figuring Clarke had gotten hurt from fighting the animal.

She gently shook the unconscious girl's shoulders, hoping to wake her up.

She stirred, but didn’t wake. 

“Clarke” Lexa called softly.

Clarke mumbled something unintelligible. However she started to get louder until Lexa could hear what she was saying.

“Beja *please*”

She was chanting it over and over, shouting at the top of her lungs.

Lexa knew it was no use trying to wake the sleeping girl, so she motioned to Octavia and they stepped outside.

“Go to the meeting point and tell them we’ve found Clarke. If we haven’t returned to Polis in the next three days, tell Indra to take you and to come look for us” Lexa said to Octavia, knowing she should be fine on her way back as Indra had trained her well.

“Sha heda” Octavia nodded before mounting her horse and heading towards the meeting point.

The commander watched her go before turning back to the cave and going in. Clarke was still mumbling but she thought she may be able to get through to her now.

“Clarke, Clarke wake up ai hodness *my love*” Lexa said gently, cradling the girl in her arms.

Clarke jolted awake and scrambled away, not releasing it was Lexa. She let the girl go, not wanting to alarm or frighten her by keeping her there.

“What, who- Lexa?” Clarke asked, fear laced in her voice.

Lexa stayed where she was, speaking softly “Clarke, it’s me, you’re okay now”

Clarke seemed to relax a bit, but the tensed up again.

“It can’t be you, you’re in Polis, you’re probably dead, just like the others” She said as she gestured around herself, as if there were other people in the cave.

Lexa didn’t know how to answer that, it had been two weeks, maybe a bit more that Clarke had been away from people, but she hadn’t expected this.

“Looks like the princess is awake again” Clarke’s head snapped up at the voice to see Finn walking towards her, clapping slowly as he went. 

“Sleep well?” he sneered, crouching down in front of her.

She shook her head and shuffled backwards.

“Oh no princess, you don’t get to backaway, I didn’t get that luxury, so neither do you” He looked towards Lexa and pointed a ghostly white finger at her.

“The knife was meant for her, not me. For HER!” He shouted this last part as Clarke curled into a shaking ball.

“I’m sorry” Clarke whispered, tears streaming down her face.

“Sorry doesn’t cut it princess” Finn got up and strode out of the cave, disappearing into the night.

Lexa watched the interaction Clarke appeared to be having with worry, she was talking to someone who wasn’t really there.

“Why are you here?” Clarkes voice was scratchy and hoarse when she spoke.

Lexa was confused at the question, “I have come to help you Clarke”

Clarke shook her head, “You’re dead though, or in Polis, you’re not here, so what do you want?”

It was at that moment Lexa realised what was wrong. Clarke was convinced that Lexa was a ghost. She was sure that Lexa was dead. It was then that she had an idea.

“Clarke, can you come with me for a moment?” Lexa said gently, standing up as she did.

Clarke nodded but didn’t speak.

Lexa led her outside where it was still raining.

“Clarke, can you feel the rain on your skin?” Lexa asked. She just nodded again.  
“Is it real?” Clarke nodded.

She brought her over to her horse and the surrounding trees.

“Clarke, can you feel the bark on the trees?” Clarke ran her hand down the rough wood and nodded.

“Can you feel the mane of my horse?” Lexa spoke softly, hoping what she was saying was getting through to Clarke.

The girl nodded again.

“Is she real?” Clarke nodded once more.

Lexa picked up Clarke's hand and brought it to where her heart was.

“Clarke, can you feel my heart beneath your hand?” Clarke finally looked up into the Commanders eyes. She didn’t respond, but her lip began to quiver.

“Clarke, am I real?” She said firmly, still holding the sky girl’s hand there.

“Lexa?” She said quietly, starting to shake.

“I’m here Clarke” Lexa said, cupping the younger girl's cheek.

Clarke flung her arms around her shoulders, burying her head in Lexa’s neck, crying and shaking all at once. Lexa’s arms encircled her waist, holding her tightly. 

“Shh” She cooed, “It’s okay Clarke, I’ve got you” Lexa spoke softly, not wanting to worry the distressed girl more.

Once Clarke was slightly calmer Lexa led her back into the cave.

“Clarke have you eaten anything?” Lexa asked softly.

She shook her head, looking at the ground.

Lexa looked in the bag she had with her and pulled out some strips of dried meat and handed it to her.

“Mochof *thank you*” Clarke said quietly.

They sat and ate in silence, but all Lexa could think about was how Clarke would never be alone again, how she would protect her, and also planning the best way to kick Titus off the tower. 

Wishful thinking.

She would take her back to Polis and help her heal from everything.

When they were finished eating Lexa stayed where she was, not wanting to push Clarke, but the blonde came over to her anyway. 

She lay down, resting her head in Lexa’s lap. Lexa stroked her head gently, listening until her breath evened out. She lent her head back against the cave wall and relaxed, closing her eyes until she too fell asleep.

The next morning when Clarke woke up fear didn’t grip her, she was ready to return to Polis, with Lexa by her side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO, Lexa found Clarke and now they just need to go back to Polis and.... KICK TITUS OFF THE TOWER!!!!!! mwahahahahahahahah! So I want to kill Titus but you know ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯. I hope it wont be another month but we'll see. Thank you so much for reading and comments are writer fuel.  
> I will try to respond to comments but if I miss them don't worry I'm not ignoring you, I'm just out looking for Clarke with Lexa, so I won't be back for a while.  
> Luuvvvvvvv yoooouuuuuuu, peace out ✌️


End file.
